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Episode 73 · 9 months ago

STAR WARS: ATTACK OF THE CLONES (2002) Discussion with Zach Basile

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Trent and Parth find themselves neck deep in prequels. 

Mosque open, how pleasant of you to join us. This party's over. Sibulba, that's your name right. Yes, hello parth. It's interesting that you come here for the attack of the clones part two discussion, given your lack of an appearance. Speak on that. Yeah, you're not in a you're not in episode two. Oh, I guess that's true. I should have been called Wado, since I texted part in the middle of the movie saying, Oh my God, I would have bet a thousand dollars that Wada wasn't in this movie. And there he is. We also have a third contestant, a returning a returning guest, a member of our second episode ever, the last Jedi discussion. Welcome back, Short Term Friend, Zach Basil. Hello, short term friend, I recently got my dual citizenship. I am a US citizen and Camino in citizens. If you need an ex lot's a hard one to get. Is that. It's difficult. It's always thinking about getting a vacation house and Kashik, but I'm like where there might be like a droid war? They're like a few years. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. That's definitely wait. Do you guys want to winter on Hoth. I was just going to say I had a vacation home on Mandalore and it didn't hand out well. Totally. It totally lost my investment. I think I'd rather have my winters on Moustafar. Wait, I want to keep naming star wars planets, but we need to get out of the way. What we've all eaten? I had an Oreo cookie, just the one though I had. I was on my way to work and it started in like ten minutes, and so I made a smoothie and a scrambled egg. I threw in some tupperware and then I ate it at work. I had two slices of Avocado Toast prepared by yours truly, whoa very nice, very nice. Wait, Zach, are we to do that on Camino or in the US of a? That was on Comedo. Yeah, I wanted to make sure my clone army was being appropriately developed. Wait, Zach, we're seeing a film a few hours from now. What film is that? It gets a spider man no way home, a film that parts saw, not have not long ago. I saw it last night. This is true, and part of what time? Yeah, yeah, what time did you see? Thirty? Well, seven hundred and twenty five to be exact. That early I thought you could. They had to go like midnight. Wait, was it like jam packed? Yeah, I mean, I got my tickets on the second day that they it was like possible to buy tickets, and even then it was like I was I'm shocked. I was able to get three at a row tickets and with seats in a row, but I was able to Zac thent you buy them like a month ago. I bought mine, my tickets on spider Monday. Fun fact, Trent, you are actually you stole your seat from a handy cap person. Wait, wow, is that? So? Am I in the handicap accompaniment zone? Wait, I hope I'm not like standing tonight, because at times I've bought like the handicap see, and then it's like this is for a person in a wheelchair, in which it is like BYOC, bring you. Now there's you. You're not in the handicap seed, but I just wanted to characterize you for the audience because I've seen you do it. We are like about one foot from the screen, so are we? Yo, dude, gotta stay for the place credit scene. Any I'm sure I heard there were two post credit scenes, so I'll be there. Is that always a thing, or is there usually one? Yeah, nowadays. Nowadays there's two. I think you your guardians, unless your guardians of the galaxy volume two, in which case you have five postcredit scenes. Like I'M MC US, post credit scenes are becoming like youtube ads were, just like there's more and more and we're not allowed to question it, you know, and they're just going to keep adding on. Can I ask you, guys a silly question, please? Did you? Did you see Venom? To let there be carnage?...

Venom? No, no, but I have seen the postcredit scene. I got DA. Let's talk about it. I haven't seen any of the Vento movies, so I'm in no. Well, trend Trent, let's how about this? How about we cut to the intro and then we can talk about it while the side? Yeah, because the thing is the intro musical. People don't know is once we enter that, it's a vacuum of time and space. So how however long we want to be in there and however long we want to talk about Benam, it's been a man. We can do that for as long as we want, but when we're back time resumes normally. Wait, but if we talk about venom, than the Sony laws are going to come after us. But we talked about spider man, then the marvel lawyers are going to come after us. Will Spider Man's owned by Sony. So I apparently I don't know anything. Fuck me, I guess. Let's start the episode then. Yeah, welcome back to crest services, where we talked about the movies each week. But yeacture. Last week we talked with Mark Sexton, storyboard artist for Star Wars episode two, attack of the clones. Trent, how was that? Was it cool or was it like awful? Our interview a stroboard artist, Mark Sexton? Yeah, yeah, that, oh, I really enjoyed myself. We asked some questions, he answered. Need I say more? But this is Prequel when our ladies and gentlemen, and so we're here to discuss the prequels and we are, we are talking about the second movie now in this prequel trilogy. And Trent, you've brought along, believe you call them your short from short term friend. Right. Yes, he accompanied us to talk about the second film in the Sequel Franchise. And now we see here for the for the prequels. Zach Basil, high school friend. Hello, hello, hello, and recent Camino in citizen. Thank you, Yana. Congratulate him. Trent, you're in charge of these discussions. Can you add in like a cheer sound effect for because that yeah, Zac, can you just hold up your passport to the camera, for I want to see Oh, but oh wow, now your picture looks really nice. We've erected a clone army and I'd say let's just let him, let's let him fight those droids. All right, all rights. SHOULD WE START OFF WITH OUR SYNOPSIS? HMM, I guess. Oh, should we make ZAC TO ATTEND WORD SYNOPSIS? Yes, ZAC, there's a new feature to the show where where the celebrity guest has to describe the film in ten words or less. Okay, padme in danger, secret clone Army Jedi can help with a word to spare. Wow, move on. Most of the time people do eleven words and hope that we don't notice. But you know, kind of Jact word. I was flying by the seat of my pants. I don't know how to count. The Actual Synopsis Is Ten Years After initially meeting and it can skywalker shares of Forbidden Romance with padme on a Dolla. Well, Obiwan Canobie investigates an assassination attempt on the senator and discovers a secret clone army crafted for the Jedi. Significantly over ten words Trent budget box office. Give it to me. So we've got a budget of one hundred and twenty million dollars in a box office of six hundred and fifty three point eight million dollars. That's like relatively disappointing. Yes, Star Wars, First Star Wars movie. I mean, I so get into it. underperformed it. How about you just get into the production history? Sure so, after the mixed critical response to the Phantom Menace, George Lucas was hesitant to return to the writing desk. He completed a rough draft for episode two in March two thousand, three months before the start of principal photography. He would then subsequently write another draft and then for help with on his third draft. He Got Jonathan Hales, who had written several episodes of the Young...

Indiana Jones chronicles, and the final script was completed just one week before the start of principal photography, which is kind of insane. The film's working title was jar jars great adventure, a sarcastic reference to the negative fan response to jar jar. Plaza Day Espagna was the filming location for the Nabu Palace and principal photography occurred between June twenty six two thousand and September twenty two thousand at Fox Studios Australia in Sydney. Location. Shooting took place in the Tunisian desert at the Plaza Day de Espana and Sevier, Seville, I don't know, London, China, Vancouver, San Diego and Italy. reshoots were performed in March two thousand and one, and during this time George Lucas developed the action scene in the DROID factory. After deciding the film La Act a quick enough pace in the corresponding time frame. The sequence is previsualization was rushed and the live action footage was shot within four and a half hours. And if you ever see the behind the scenes documentary stuff of that scene, it's kind of ridiculous the way they're shooting it, because the actors clearly have no idea what's going on. Wait, some extent, neither just George Lucas, the droid, the DROID factory scene. It's just them in a blue screen like running around and George's like, ah, I don't know, Roun, be on your back all full. Is Really is all too painted. Read careful what you're saying in about far for because you can get popped the head real quick. Of all the ridiculous shots and sequences in this movie, the sequence that's stuck out to me as uniquely bad is in the droid factory when c three Po like falls and then he's just like getting decapitated and disemboweled, and it's the worst CGI madness I've seen in a long time. I love when it cuts from like practical Anthony Daniels in the costume and then it's so clearly is like a todt shoving a CG, just like the geometry of the way that see through Peo's arms can bend completely changes midair, like he folds. Yeah, see three bio is an't erect man any HMM. Sorry. Anyways, there is a kid show Trent. Because of Lucas's method of creating shots through various departments and sources that are some times miles and years apart from each other. Attack of the clones became the first film ever to be produced through what rick mccollum called virtual filmmaking. Attack of the clones further several technological developments and effectively moved Hollywood into the digital age with the use of the HD W F nine hundred, developed by Sony and Penn a vision, a digital camera using an HD digital twenty four frame system. Lucas stated that he wanted to film the Phantom menace on this format, but Sony was not able to build the camera quickly enough. In two thousand and two attack of the clones became the third film to be released that was shot entirely on a twenty four frame digital camera. The cameras recorded in sixteen by nine hdcam format, ten DP. Although the image was cropped to two hundred and forty one widescreen ratio, the area above and below the two hundred forty extraction area was available for Lucas to reframe the picture as necessary. And Post production the film relied almost solely on digital animatics, as opposed to storyboards, in order to pre visualize sequences for editing early on in the film's production, which I feel like that our interview with Mark Sexton, where he says that there was literally no other storyboard artist working on the movie other than him in Australia. Further's that information, the out placement firm Challenger, gry and Christmas predicted that US companies would lose about three hundred and nineteen million dollars in productivity due to employees calling calling in sick and heading to theaters to see the movie. It premiered US part of the inaugural Tribeck of Film Festival at the BMCC Performing Arts Center and New York City at a Sunday may twelfth set of screenings benefiting the children's aid society assist, a charity supported by George Lucas. Attack of the clones was then screened out...

...of competition at the two thousand and two can film festival before getting a worldwide three at theatrical release on May Sixteen two thousand and two. It was also later released in Imax theaters, but it had not been filmed for Imax, but was up converted with digital remastering processes because of the technical limitations of the Imax projector at the time and edited. One hundred twenty minute version of the film was presented. I would say release the shorter cut. Remember when Star Wars movies were summer blockbusters and not just released at Christmas time. It's pretty awesome. Okay with me with someone do one to hear the fun facts now. Yeah, that'd be cool. Just before Anakin goes to search for his mother on Tattooine, he has a conversation with Senator Amidala. The camera pans to their shadows as they talk, and Anakin resembles that of Darth vader. According to the DVD audio commentary, the Vader like shadow that and it can cast is not a visual effect but a coincidence. When Jango feth gets into his ship after his fight with Obiwan, he banks his head on the partially open door. This was intentional and as a reference to the famous coup from Star Wars episode for a new hope, where Strom trooper accidentally banks his head on a door. Quick note about this. I looked this up because I wasn't sure about it and there was a whole youtube conspiracy about how this fact isn't true, and there's a frame by frame breakdown of Django fet's head narrowly missing the door. So Samuel Jackson has had has said that the words bad motherfucker engraved on the hilt of his Lightsaber, the same words that are famously printed on the wallet of Jackson's character, Jules Winfield, and pulp fiction. Yeah, I want you to go in that bag and find know wat it's one. Is it just the one to say it's bad, motherfucker. The entire aggressive negotiations conversation during the dinner scene between Anakin and Padmey was adlubbed by Hayden Christensen and at Allie Portman, at George Lucas's request, due to his not being happy with a romantic dialog that he wrote for the scene. And the only star wars film that was not the top grossing film of the year North America, this one placed behind spider man and the Lord of the Rings, the two towers, and with estimate a budget of one hundred twenty million, this was the most expensive star wars film until Star Wars The force awakens in two thousand and fifteen, with an estimated budget of two hundred million dollars. I'm amazed that the budget for revenge of the Sith wasn't higher than this. Being that, I was going to say, being that that movie is this movie, but better and bigger. You know, although well, one thing that might be part of the thing is that this movie will not using them particularly well. Created a lot of technologies that I guess we're perfected upon, but then they then also cost us money to use, Yag because I read that in the first movie they weren't even comfortable with having like a CGI Yoda hopping around and then clearly in the three year span they felt comfortable enough for that so ilm had to be doing something part I was thinking about how all of my comments for the phantom menace could sort of just be copy and pasted onto this movie. Those are some pretty negative comments. It's almost like you could write a one star review of this movie. WHOA look at that. Ye, look at me, I'm awesome, Zachary Basil. Yes, sir, would you read our first one star review for us? I would love to. Just like that we're into the next section, a review by that's Mr gringe. To you, the weakest movie in the franchise, one out of five stars, though a slightly better BLU ray master over episode one. This movie is barely watchable. Nothing happens. Wow. That that's what made me think of the phantom menace, because our take because we got into the chat of the phantom menace and parts like. It's amazing because this in this movie that's two hours long, nothing really happens, and this one is two and a half hours long. Yeah, and similarly so not that much goes down in this. Next Review by Joseph E mcphan. It is titled Not Me and it reads I didn't order it, my daughter did, but...

I changed my password. Well, there's a happy ending to this story, so it seems like there won't be another incident bus in the mcphan household. If you if you rent star wars attack of the clones, once the passwords getting changed. Okay, all right. On to our last review. This is by Michelle with titled it's sad to have all the rich dialog. You'll see where this is going. It's sad to have all the set. Okay, it's sad to have all the rich dialog, storyline and acting of the Great Hollywood films of the s replaced by the overreliance on computer graphics, low cut dresses and intense and unbelievable violence we have today. It's a loss for star wars fans that the rest of the series isn't at the same level as the first two films. I would say that rich dialog is is not what the original trilogy is known for. No, I think people need to get it out of their heads that the original star Wars trilogies were some like pinnacle of a writing achievement. They're very good movies. I think people just put them in the untouchable category and then they don't think about the elements in which it is not exemplary. You know, not only unbelievable violence, intense violence. I think they're mad about padmes at tire in in like the in the what's it called? In like the big monster brawl thing. And let me tell you, a star wars needed a sex symbol and I'm here for it. And also Hayde and Christensen. He's fucking hot in this movie too. Yes, not as good as he looks in the next one. Is Blow here. So I know that's a hot take. I think it's not. But an episode two and now he's got this big imperial army, but it's not imperial yet, but it's it's a storm troopers, the outfits, the weapons systems to counter this outside threat run by Count Duku, that the Samma bin Laden guy that actually works for him and they meet the sacred. Now an episode three, he launches an attack on the imperial capital himself. He launches an attack on New York and then he gets captured and and then he sets up count Duku to get killed and then he seduces to the dark side Anaica Skywalker to make him darth vader. And in the end he then sets up, after he has the police state in place, he sets up the Jedi and says they're terrorist and has the anti terror forces going and wipe them out. And then he says he's launching a global intergalactic war to bring peace and he and Obi wants switch hairstyles, essentially in the next movie. Wow and and they are both better suited to what they have in episode three. I think bull should we get into the meat and potatoes? Sure should. We had have our guests talk about I don't know. GIVES US aw a soft introduction to what's working and what's not working in the film. All right, so wait, which half are we starting on? Positive or negative? I think I want to start with the negative just because it looms. It's looming like a thunder cloud, you know, and I think the biggest, like one of the bigger problems I have with it is that we have the first episode in the trilogy to Phantom Menace, which, by all accounts, should be doing like the heavy lifting with the exposition dump. Yeah, but then we do a ten year time jump at the beginning of this one and we're back to square one. Yeah. So now the way you renders. Yeah, they because in new hope you're doing so much heavy let you have to build the whole world, but then you just do a little time jump and then you don't need to do any you don't need any more building blocks. You just have fun, exactly. But meanwhile in the first movie, not all that much happens. We get introduced to Anakin, Padme Qui gone. He dies, Doth Mal does. At least he's cut. He's cut in half, but it as as far as star wars. We all saw solo. That does so you're dead, and I really think that's where this movie takes a big hit, is in it's bogged down by you know, there's a lot in a political situation, which is what these movies are, their political there's a ten year time gap, is humongous. Like now you...

...need to be completely caught back up with what's going on, even though I guess the Trade Federation is still involved, and equally as a symbolically racist. No, I love when they when they go shoot them or something. Yeah, that was that was their biggest contribution to this movie. Yes, she caught that shoot something. Do you guys know the scene where Count Duku is trying to like rally support for like them to sign the treaty and and Obiwan is like spying on them and they got they like cut around the table and there's all these different CGI creatures. That, yeah, that is like nothing short of just like a disgrace. No, it and it treads of what I was just sitting there. I'm like, what are we doing? God, I'm like, this is bad and this is a terrible section of an already bad thing. I am quite convinced the ten thousand four systems really to our close. When you also called Glen Teut the banking man, which, Shane, your creaky good, very good. I mean like, I don't think this movie is it has good ideas in it. I think of episode one and two. I think this has more story to it that like matters, which is like this movie does have main characters, which helps. Yeah, that's that was the thing that we were like landing on so hard on the first movie is that it is like one of the few films I've ever seen that genuinely has no protagonist, and this one does, which is good, except that your main protagonist like sucks and is like awful throughout the entire movie. I think the problem is that George Lucas didn't doesn't understand character arcs at this point when he's writing episode two. And and it's funny because when we interviewed Mark Sexton, we're on a market term basis, he was like, oh, he whenever you would ask something, he would answer in terms of like backstory, and I think that's that mentality is what bogs down, at least these first two films that I've rewatched, which is that there's so much thought into the intricacies of like the Minutia and the Lore, and the thing is, when you're watching a movie, none of that a hundred percent matters really, like it's nice to have it there if it's good, but what matters is your characters, what they're doing and how they change. Like it doesn't seem like George Lucas understands that, because the one character with the chartable like arc is Anakin that should be Anakin in that he should be like nice old Jedi that, like we're seeing become darker and darker through the problems that he encounters in this movie. Yeah, the problem being he's like an awful whiney, like baby the entire movie, like from his opening scene. Yes, yeah, I think the exact same thing. I was like, I see we're trying to do. You're trying the way the foundation for him like lashing out in tiny ways, but I'm like he's already just like a Dick, so much so the like it's clear he's he doesn't respect his master and he's going to overthrown, and he's like creepy towards pad me. He's like you're exactly the way I remember doing my dreams, like unprompted in like there one their first seen together alone. It's really bizarre. Yeah, well, we talked about this before we got on air, but in the friend their first scene together, and I can just like stares at her, giving it given her bedroom eyes, and she's like and again, don't do that makes me uncomfortable and over and then he kisses her and she's like, I...

...shouldn't done that. I'm like what? And then two weeks later they're all married. Yeah, okay, will you have a few you have a few neardeath experiences and all that shared trauma. That's enough to build a wife on. These tell me an me like that. It makes me feel uncomfortable. Silently, at the end of their first scene, as she's leaving, pad may says, you'll always be that ten year old boy I met on R that's mean. And then two weeks later they're married. That's alarming about it's it's just like shocking to me, like the ten year gap again. We said this in our phantom menace one. He should not have been ten years old in the first move. Are Niner, however, hold old is he should have been. The AG is here, if maybe a few years younger, but it's shocking to me that they have the story be that he never sees her for ten years, because if you want me to believe that, like they fall in love, they should have like maybe seen each other grow and like work together and so they have an established relationship, because that way, from the beginning of the movie you're working with. Oh these people that have known each other for like ten years or whatever, and now they're starting and like they only saw each other as friends and now they're friends to lovers, you know what I mean, like Forbidden Love, like you could still have all of that, but it just makes so much more sense if you continue the good will that you have from phantom menace and just like carry that over, which is the exact same thing. It does. Exactly what you're saying, is that hits the recent button for no reason. It's not like it like wants to introduce a different love interest or something like. It's for no reason. It just does that. Let me share a grievance that has nothing to do with anything. This is about the female assassin from the beginning and her being a shape shifter and me having no idea about this until like a year ago. I always just thought that she had to hit with the poisoned dart and then she just like shrivels up. But no, it dehydrates her. Yeah, know, but she's an alien. Yeah, well, if we want to get into that, she's a changeling and she doesn't change it to any like her. One thing is that she can change into things, and she doesn't change into anything. Now, why doesn't? Being chaste, I know. And Obi Wan's like she's a changeling. She could be anywhere and she be extra careful. Yeah, and she chooses not to. Yeah, I know, she'd have been the death sticks guy. Yeah, I'd like to think that maybe the force would have revealed who she was regardless of like. That would be sense, it wouldn't? That have been a cool scene. That would have been I would have loved to see that part. You're joking about the death sticks and I read something in the Trivia and it was like George Lucas named this fictional addictive drug death sticks, in reference to cigarettes, and then it goes within the universe. Death sticks, much like cigarettes, are very addictive and after each one you're craving for each increases and eventually they'll kill you. And I was like, thanks, George Lucas. You really needed to spend so much time on that. You want to buy syndath sticks. Doesn't want to sell the death sticks. I want to sell you d sticks. You want to go home and rethink your like I want to go home and reading of my life. I can I ask you a question. Sure, do I want to death stay? You want to buy? You want to buy some death sticks? Another thing I realized. Okay, so do you remember when you guys were kids and you would watched our wars and the opening crawl would come up and you would be like those are words? Mm Yeah, but I can't, I can't and will not read them and if I did, there would be no point. And then I reach a point where I was like sixteen, I was like, Oh, I know how to read now, those are words. Republic, Galaxy, skywalker, great, and now I read them at the age of twenty, with like a full understanding of English grammar. Comment's interesting. It takes you twenty years to fully comprehend your natively language continue every day and APP and after these twenty years, I realized that the words mean nothing. Again,...

...they're not. Yeah, you kind of have to revert back. It's shocking how bad the opening crawls are for the prequel trilogy. Like the Prequel, like the opening crawl for the first one necessary, and after that it's kind of just like saying stuff that isn't that important, but just continuing on with the trend of having open and crawl. Yeah, what's more shocking is that the opening crawls can get worse in the sequel trilogy. I think the one in the Horse Awakens is okay, and then after that it's like all stupid palpatoone returns. Somehow, somehow, Palpa's returned. We've the COT of the Intel from the first orders. Fine, and it confirms the worst. Somehow palpataine returned. Oh my God, we're blieving with leading guys. We have to talk about this bad star wars movie, not the other bad star wars movie. But there's so many bad star wars movies that choose. It's true. I are there more bad star wars movies than good. Like. No, like to find good, but I mean honestly at this like. I guess. I guess I like more than I dislike. Are Like I enjoy watching more than it like. I don't. I didn't even like hate myself watching the majority of this movie, I think partially because I've, like Stockholm Syndrome, myself into liking watching it from watching it so much as a kid. So like it, doesn't like the awfulness of it, doesn't like register for most of the movie until like the last half hour where I was like this is so much fucking nonsense, like all of the like battle, like it was just like this is so bad that there was a point in the arena battle, just like it's already going on for so long, and then they're circled again. It's like it goes through like several arcs of like the Jedis are screwed and then the rescued, and then they're screwed again and the rescued agather and right if they're surrounded for the second time and then the Jedi ships swoop and I'm like we're just starting another battle, like we said, the same battle in the same place, another just a few more elements, I'm gonna have the same battle. And like that's the thing with the whole movie, like there's such an overreliance on lightsabers, like anything happens and they fucking pop a bad boy one out and it's like you don't need lightsabers for literally everything, like it's shot and it like completely like deflates any like and it can roll. This is cool, and it can ruins like three lightsabers in this movie, like it's a bit. That's like such a stupid bit, and I was thinking about it. Okay, so, like the best lightsaberer battle, pretty objectively, is the one at the end of empire between Darth vader and Luke cool, and that's like one weightsaber battle and it goes through all these different settings and it's about and it just like these two characters and it's continuous and they're saying words at each other. And then the big lightsaber battle in this one is with count duku and Anakin and Obiwan at the end and with them, yeah, and with Yoda and with them. The stick is it's all on the same place, but just the parties involved keeps rotating and I'm like, I just it just count do Google like dropping rocks on them and like facing them one at a time. While we're on the subject of little fucking Yoda, this movie like, I think, other than what ends up happening in the sequel trilogy, which we're not going to talk about that, but we'll talk about that next week on the show. Yeah, it's shocking to me how badly the force is like misunderstood by George Lucas, like it really bothered the creative counts that count Douku is like we can't determine the winner of this contest by our skills in the force. We need to do it by like fighting with our fucking lightsabers. And like his skills with the force is like throwing a pipe with the force, okay, or electric shocky shock, and then like crumbling a little bit of the building.

And then Yoda comes in and is like stick and is walking like really old and decrepit ripple and he's like he's like Yoda, I am. I. I mean it's a horrible Yoda voice, but you know what I mean. Like Yoda speech pattern in the originals is endearing, like Oh, it's kind of backwards, and here doesn't work at all. Here I was okay, the sentences are too wordy. When Yoda was commit okay, first of all Yoda should not be a military general. But here's Yoda commanding a fleet of clones to go intercept count Dugu or whatever, and he literally says something like go to intercept the ship. We must. That was business. It's the same word, intercept. It's weird because the prequel trilogy keeps like it's like a double edged sword, because I appreciate what it does to like expand the universe and it does create like a lot more world and interesting like backstory and all these like ships and droids and all this shit that's really cool and different and not at all like the original trilogy. But it still feels the need to like cram in, like Yoda, like the the clone army is a random thing they reference just like in there and they have to put it in here and like Yoda has to be in here and see three Po has to be built by Anakin and RTD to also needs to be on their mission. And also Django Fett needs to exist for and for Boba Fett to exist, for Boba Fett. But why does Boba Fett have to be in this? BOBA FETT is some random bounty hunter in empire strikes, but there's literally no reason reason for him to exist in this movie other than remember this. But all it does is make the universe feel smaller. Yeah, my exact thought with Jango fet because you know, as a kid I was like, well, those little those dual wheeld epistols are pretty cool. Jet Pack Pretty Cool. But now I thought, okay, so they did jar jar and included didn't work and so they thought who's our fan favorite character? And they said Boba Fett and they said, well, I can't put Bobaf bet in this movie. And so what? Just carbon copy Boba fette literally and let's just throw them into the movie for No fucking reason, and he'll be big and on the poster, even though he's very minor, and he'll get the capitated around the hour fifteen mark. Cool, okay, and serves little to no story purpose beyond he is the person. He has a cloning. He is away turn in sight conflict in the first two thirds of the movie, because otherwise there would be no battle scenes. Point of clarity. Is Jango fete a Mandalorian? No, okay, so then I don't think so. I can't rat. So it would make sense. Of Jango fete was like this masterful, you know, like fighter or something incredible, and that's why they base their clones off of him. But like, like basically just there, and then Mace wind you doesn't even he doesn't even try when he kills him. It's like I like again, I'm not going to include whatever's done in the Mandalorian. I've seen the first season. I haven't seen the second season, but like at the time of creation, Django fete is just some guy. It's not some guy that they've liked tested on and they're like this is the perfect human like they captain America at him or something like. It's he's literally some bounty Hunter Guy. I'm always a little bit confused by the fact that, like, okay, we made this clone army and the clone armies cloned from this guy who we consider our enemy, and then they're like, okay, well then the clones like won't be an issue, like even though the person that even though the person they're based off of is an assassin who tried to kill our princess. Yeah, no, they'll be our army. Cool, if you, if you paid attention while we were on Camino, they genetically alter then to be, yeah, to be very obedient sort so you can tell them, well, okay, not to get this is I'm I feel like I'm swinging between ideas. But also when padme falls off the speeder and like a bunch of clones fall with her, she just like gets...

...up and she starts issuing orders to clones as like well, are they obedient to everybody? Like what knowledge do they have of pad met? Like why are they accepting these orders from her? They seem like it's terrible army. It's weird because there's like these big battle scenes that have to exist because George Lucas is like, like what's weird about this movie is that it's one big tech Demo, like it's I want to chest out this camera, I want to test out these visual effects, with no regard to how good they look or if it works. And so he writes these huge battle scenes so that he can like make big thing go boom, and it's just like what character is doing things right now? They can, they can be a committee. YODA's they're sure he can be a military permit commander. Yeah, why not? Like it has no story purpose. It's just like shocking. It's just really bad. You want to know something that happened that I truly was in disbelief like at this point, like while was happening at this point. It's hard to have something take place into Star Wars movie where I'm like, Oh, I didn't know that happened because I've seen them all by this point. So padme and Anakin are like picnicking in the grass field or whatever, and then they cut away and then they come back and Anakin is like riding like a big and Boh, yeah, like a big lampbo watermelon, and then we just watch that for life, a minute, ninety seconds, and then we just cut away, like that was the whole scene with the animals with a big leg there for whatever reason, like there's a huge, like rear end portion of the animal, right, or am I thinking of an animal, isn't it? No, he's on, he's on, it's like neck or something, and he's riding. He's writing. It's a neck, and then it likes stumbles a little bit. And Yeah, and then he fakes being dead. Yes, he's like it's he's literally the kid in the swimming pool at the hang out, facedown really hoping that his friends get concerned about it. I fhy that kid was Trent. Yeah, yeah, yeah, big time. Is there anything? Wait, of course there's more bad things to like or talk about, but like, is there any good stuff? Here's a good thing that I have to say about this place. I think in certain respects the casting is impeccible. With I agree. I like you, Gregor. I don't hate he and Christensen as much as anyone else does. Okay, I feel he's better in convenge of this sith. Yeah, he will. People are psychlos maybe you know who one can Obie TV show. People just like to feel strongly in one direction or the other, because we if you really come full circle on this, I think people are just put pissed off at the sequel trilogy now and now with likes like rose colored glasses, they're looking back at the prequel trilogy and they're like no, it's so good. Well at least, yeah, there was like a coherent plot. Yeah, I mean there's like a three story. A lot of thought went into the plot, which is the opposite. Like in a lot of ways, the sequel trilogy, in the Prequel's trilogy, are like Yin and yeah, yeah, like why they don't work? Because the this this trilogy has terrible visuals and like a lot of really poorly thought out CGI inclusions that don't look good and generally kind of bad acting. I'm pretty much everything looks good and the sequels, but just what they're choosing to put on screen. It makes no sense. It makes no sense. Like I guess I respect this movies again, it's just like visually so cool and different and like all the like sound work, like that speeder chase or whatever the fuck it is that happens with like Obi Wan and Anakin as they're trying to get the bat, like that's cool, that's really seen. It was good. Like looks kind of not, like there's kind of mess CG, but it's like fine, you know what CG actually I thought worked and held up even twenty years later. We were it was at least the praying Mantis in the coliseum. I left at that and I was like that you know that there's brew CGI than that. Coming out in the year two thousand and twenty one, I felt like it had weight to it. Yeah, you know, know that...

...whole scene, like it leaves when the monsters are involved. Come pretty on board. Yeah, it's good. I like, I hate to say it like that is the centerpiece of the movie, given that the Count Duke Wu stuff at the end is so anticlimactic. It's also like so badly shot. The Count Duke stuff. It's just like did you notice when it's Anakin versus him and they're like waving? Yeah, they're blue and red lightsabers, and it's cutting to these two closeups of the two of them and they just like flip the footage like they're fighting and it's close up and Duke's on the left and Anakin's on the right, and then they cut to a white shot and they flip like they switch positions and then take the same footage and just like horizontally flip it. It looks terrible. I didn't pick up on that, but I believe you know it's there's there's better fights before and after. The Cross cutting like continues to amaze me. It's less bad in this movie, Um less bad as in their less parties. Like it's basically you're either on team OBI WAN or on Team Anakin and pad me, which are like two teams that I would like to think that I'm down to hang out with, but it's that the frequency at which it goes back and forth. It just like there aren't sizeable chunks. It just like a little it's just like a little moments and then we're doing a big sidewipe or a big or a big looney tunes circle transition and then we're just on another planet for like no disrounible reason. It's kind of like a it has the same problem as the phantom menace, where it doesn't have a clear structure and it's kind of just again lore things happening, but not necessarily the why and the how are thought out, and so like they're just cutting really haphazardly to keep the pace going. I don't think it would be. And maybe this is just because I saw this as a kid for the first time. I don't think there was anybody who sat down and watched attack of the clones for the first time and completely understood what was happening. No, because if you see, like if you could show your brain off and just let the sequences take you through, like the action, you're like, okay, this is what's happening, but then you pause and you say so, hang on a second. A secret Jedi ten years earlier placed an order for one point two million clones and they're just ready now, and a bounty hunter recently sent an assassin to kill this senator, and that's why we found out about it. And now we're just going to take it that no sense, that you made a good observation that one point two million clones in terms of the galaxy would be pretty pretty useless. Yeah, yeah, it's really not a sizeable army, and also that they've been working on this order for ten years and no one never contacted, no one followed up, and they're like hey, we're seventy five percent through this army. Give us and there were, and they were like go, this is payment, this is going to happen. The the orders going to come through on time ten years later. Yeah, it's also fucking lucky that they ordered it ten years if it needs ten years to build, they're lucky that it got ready. Right, is their dilemma was coming to a head. So, to be clear, I thought I understood it, but it was count Doogo who placed the order. Right, I believe so. Right, yeah, he does it under the like secret identity UNs CIPHO DS or whatever the fuck his name was. It was whoever was on the Jedi canceled ten years ago, but got is now dead. Can We? Can we talk about how jar J are is like put in a roll to like really change the course of the universe? And just going to say, because I never talked about you talk about characters, I was thinking about when you were talking about character arcs and if nobody got a bigger character arc than Jar Jarre, who goes from an idiot just like bumbling around a battlefields. Now, yeah, he's a senator by the end of it and he votes to to provoke the to crown the emperor. Like nobody has a more consequential character arc than...

...charge are. I love how padme is like, all right, jar J are, I'm leaving, I'm leaving all my responsibility to you, the stupidest person in the franchise. Here's the powers change everything. And even when, even when jarge is making the like missip think that will show problem. Emergency powers, like, even when he's doing that, he saying it in like a stupid way and I I had it with subtitles on and he's like swapping the first letter of words with each other and I'm like this is so stupid. In response, Public Missa propos that the Senate give immediately emergency powers to the supreme chance lack. That's such a big if you when it plays out in the movie. If you miss it, it kind of doesn't matter the context of the movie, but realistically in terms of this trilogy, that is when keep it goes from like chancellor to like powerful chancellor, is like causing like overtly all of the shit that's about to go down. Wouldn't you want, like Padmet to make that decision and like it would be way more impactful when it all goes to shit, because it's like, oh, someone in my find was miss led and like that can happen, but it's like, oh, we put the do we made the dumbest person in the United States the president and then things went bad. Did we do that? Yeah, well, Nice, Hey, don junior wasn't president. It was just great. Two Twenty Two thousand and twenty two. The music's good. I wish just rex good. I was just gonna say, like, I know I criticized the music in the last episode, but and they did recycled the duel things in this for a little bit, which is weird. I will say this. The music is good, but it pisses me off because they use themes for other characters during scenes in which those characters are not present, like during the droid factory bat chase thing. That happens, Yoda's theme plays for no discernible reason. When he's on his speeder, the duel of the fates theme plays. Yes, it for no discernible reason other than this sounds cool right now, and it's just like such a weird decision. Like I don't know if that's John Williams faults, or if that's like George Lucas in the music editors. I just liked the pad may theme. Whenever Pad May and Anakin we're hanging out. Why you want to enter the rating scountlet. Does anyone have anything else? I think I don't know. I don't have many good things to say. Wait, I have one. Guy Wanted. Wait. please. Are a good thing? All Right, you ask your question after what my good thing is? The one time that I liked Hayne Christensen's performance, or like exceptionally so, I didn't hate it out right, was after he killed all the sand people and he was like really angry. I'm like yeah, I'm like, yeah, you fucking killed those women and children. I killed them all. They're dead, every single one of them, and not just the men but the women and the children too. They're like animals and I slaughtered them like animals. I hate them, I think. So it's offset by her. Yeah, go ahead on the think you're gonna...

...say what I'm saying. Well, I was just going to bring up the scene where he's having a nightmare in bed and it's literally just like hating Christensen, like muscle bold, though no, no, he's a yelling no and asleep. It's not good. I hate, I hate how movies think that people just like sit around and like breathe deeply and then that can be like a shot and of itself, and I'd be like and can breathe deeply. You're like, nope, that's not an action. Yeah, everyone's breathing deeply all the time. No, Partha, seems like you're kind of acting like one of the dead sand people right now. HMM, interesting. Well, one of those dead sand people. You know what they love to do? What her you do? You know what those dead sand people do? You know where they like to go? We're just just ask where. Yeah, thanks right. They love to go into the ratings gauntlet, to which is where I go. So Zach, we have a new thing that after we say the rating scauntlet, we drop a nuclear bomb, sound effects, and then we all have to scream, like the fall out exactly. Kio, Oh, we're doing it right now. I thought. Ya know, it's happening. It's happening, it's happening. Okay, okay, what is that bright light? It was a quick consideration. Sorry, I know, I guess it's doesn't make sense. That, even though it's a nuclear bomb, our impression is like, as if you have time to react to the explosion that is the nuclear bomb. This is kind of like, oh, there's that, and then just nothing for you. I could scream an agony, if you want me to do that. Instead, I just figured doing to doing just be safe, just for the edit. All right, I'd say now we're ready to rate the movie. Who wants to go first here? Is it five or ten? Hundred and ten? Well, I guess it doesn't matter. I can just start. Well, well, first we start off with would you recommend it and would you rewatch it, or like, how rewatchable is it? This is the gauntlet part of the ratings. Colt so Zach, if you'd like to say how we watchable you find this movie and whether you'd recommend it, and then you're out of ten rating. So, on a timescale of like maybe once every eight years, I would re watch this movie like once a decade, maybe just because I've only been alive for two decades, but I have watched it about once a decade or so now, and each time I find new things that are interesting to me. I would rate it like just as an overall quality and not so as a film, like not in the greater like nine movies or six movement text yeah, it's like a one or two out of ten. It's really it's because if you viewed it individually, like it's actually when it's actually kind of pathetic, like this and Phantomat us are both like sad and like, but if someone without an understanding of the Star Wars Universe went and saw this, they'd be like, why would you do that to me, like literally be cruel. It's it. I think it deserves. I think I've always said that this is the worst star wars movie, sequels included, and I think that remains my opinion. I think, for what it's worth, this is more watchable than the phantom menace. Yes, I would agree, and it's funny that this man has had like pod racing, which was like, but there were so few pod racing moments in little. Also, no pod racing in this film. You're correct, no, but I mean like a moment of the same, like interress in caught caliber. Yeah, there's no. So you're in the phantom menace that has pod racing and it has darth Maul,...

...and this kind of has nothing, but it's just like feel like throughout people are doing things. Yeah, that is not always the case in the phantom menace, I think everything outside of what I singled out in the phantom menace is pretty unforgivable. And then this is just like bad, but it's like spread out and so it's like very consistent levels bad. So at least I can like paste myself. With that being said, the curse of why I will never rewatch this movie. It was. If I ever was in the mood to watch a Prequel, I'd watch revenge of the Sith and I would fall asleep in the first thirty minutes. And it's amazing that that movie like kind of does as much as it does when it's preceded by two movies that do nothing. Yeah, and, like it does have a lot of catching up to do, but, like that movie, being sensible at all is a complete miracle. All right, Trent, Trent, what do you you enter the rating? Gun Rating Scotlet now I'll give it like a three when I recommend it. Like no, will I really have I rewatched it? No, and will I know I have literally haven't watched this since I probably saw it for the first time when I was like a child, and I think Claire a pell, our guest on last week show, made a very poignant point that the first two prequels, Phan of the US on tack of the clones, are best summarized through their levels in the Lego Star Wars video game, because, for what it's worth, like those make more sense than this dust. You're more linearating what. I recommend this only if you're like a star wars person that's like a completionist. What? I rewatch it only when I want to, like I feel like every few years I'll be like maybe I'll like the prequels and I rewatched them and I go revenge of the Sith can can be fun, and that's pretty much all it has to offer me. They're just too long and boring to justify what little nice things they do have. Out of ten, like a two point five. Yeah, it's not a good movie. Like this movie, like it needed to save count Dooku for like for Anakin to complete his evil arc by killing him the beginning of the next movie, but like doing something with him at the end of this movie would have given it a little bit of Gravatoas and be like in the opening crawl. This is who you're saying the villain is, and now we're actually doing something with it, and he doesn't just like fight once and then escape. Yeah, I think it doesn't help and I'm sorry if this is it. We should have said this earlier place. These movies might be more rewatchable. I don't know how you feel about the animated clone series television series, but I genuinely think that they contribute to their rewatchability trends, and I have some choice words for the clones series. I know the animation is hard to watch, but like, you can really get some of the best of Star Wars if you watch them. Are you on the same side of this or are you opposed? That's I mean. Are you now, partner? Are On the same side, which I think is opposed to I'm well, I'm not opposed to it. I just think that, like whenever I've tried to watch the clone wars, I've always been like this is this would have been my favorite show if I was like fifteen years younger. Yeah, exact like ZAC. I Your House like several times, I think have we tried to watch star wars, the clone wars, and then you know, fallen asleep within the first fifteen minutes because it's for children. Yes, yeah, well, definitely the and this is somebody who's who I've seen like numerous episodes. I've watched them. The first season is particularly childlike, and then they kind of kick into gear and it becomes a little bit less overtly for children, overtly for children, which I mean it is for children, so I can't complain, but it definitely feels in a lot to because we miss so much characterization of anakin between episodes two and three, that all of that is in the clone I was just going to say so, since one of our complaints is that by the end of attack of the clones, like...

Anakin is already like a violent sociopath it. Does he behave that way for all of the clone wars? No, he's a respected general and he has his own Padawan, a SOCO SAKA or whatever. Sorry, that's a Japanese tennis player. Yeah, I think my problem has always just been that like anakin feels like a completely different character in the show. He's so inconsistently written. Like he feels like a different character in the third movie too, because he feels like a like a well meaning person as opposed to like a fascist like creep in this movie. kind of like a dictatorship to me. People what topical. The problem is that people don't agree all the time. Well then they should be made to I will say I'll from what I've seen and know about the last season that came out. That seems pretty cool. I don't know if it's worth for me going through six seasons of television to get to that, though, but you know how people, like grown adults are, like peeing the pants over the Disney plush show like the bad batch or whatever. I heard that's good also, like I'm sure it's fine, but like I don't even have the time to worry about the MANDALORIAN. You think I'm gonna go watch this animated Star Wars Spin off? I'm not. I mean it's if you want a deeper insight into like the political machinations that George Lucas cooked up, like this is his outlet for it, because you can waste any number of episodes doing something silly. When you've got like however many episodes in a season, you know you're meanwhile, in a movie, it's a much more limited format and you can't waste two movies of your trilogy on Exposition. Well, I mean you can, you probably just shouldn't. You can, as as demonstrated here by the George Lucas had creative control on the show. I was like the impression that he was like like yes, and know it well. It was back for Disney owned it. No, I'm like yes, in that he's like overseeing it, but not you. But know in that he's not like the writers room, like he can probably like Nick's ideas and they probably go to him and they're like does this fit in? And he'll be like, I don't know, maybe, sure, more jarred or wait, have you seen? This will be like the last thing I say before we have to go out. But there is in the behind the scenes for this movie. Because Yoda was CG, they had to and I think we might have mentioned this on another episode, but all these CG artists are freaking out because, like, light needs to pass through Yoda's ear and because of that they need to know what color his blood is, because that's that would determine how the light passes through the ear. And they're flipping out because it's like we can't find it. Where's the answer. Where's the answer? Oh my God, we don't know. And then they go to George Lucas and they're like, George, what color is Yoda's blood? And just goes, I don't know, green, like does not give a fuck about us. Like why does he draw the line there? Like like why are like why are death sticks? Like why are they? I don't think, I don't they does that? I don't think he like. I think he writes death sticks as like a funny little thing. And then some guy, I that's like in Lucas film, rating for Lucas Film, thinks that people won't understand the analogy to cigarettes. And then this describes the long term effects of cigarette. Yes, thanks, yes, yeah, in my in the research I was like, Oh fuck, I thought cigarettes were fine. I'm smoking them this whole time. Well, make sure to follow us in all of our social media and leave us a good review, and it might help peel transport. Soul Zach, would you leave a good review on our show? Oh, I've already left a good review. I think it's quite good and you know what it I'll tell you afterwards. But wait, five stars and everything, Five Stars and everything. Yet, wow, would you recommend the show to a friend. Well, that's what I was going to say. Is an associate of mine. You know him as Wexler, distructo.

Trent recently took a class in college, university, where he had to watch sorry to bother you, and I was like, well, listen, a good friend of mine part and this idiot that he has a podcast with, yeah, made a podcast episode would start best ourd bother you and you should watch it. And he watched it and he's watched some other episodes and you've got a new fan. Yeah, so watching, my watching our podcast episodes of the best, not listening. Watching. Okay, all right, now, I don't recommend it, and this is why I'm Zack's friend and you're the little idiot that co hosts the show. Yeah, you're a little pedantic, if I do say so myself. All right, well, now that the word pedantics from reckn out, I think we should all I think we should all go our separate way us. All right, I know Zat, you exact Zac. You are now in a hall of fame of return guests. Oh my yeah, this was only been done to to other people. Yes, Oh, you are the bronze medalist you are the third person to come to the moon. So you're not Neil Armstrong, you're not buzz all trend. We don't know. We don't know. And knows your name. Well, me ask you this. Have you guys done empire strikes back yet? We haven't done any of the original trilogy. So whenever we do, the next second, and I'm always here for the second. If, yeah, if you find yourselves in need of a guest. Yeah, well, we have to compute. That would just be completing the cycle. You know. Yeah, are very probably of Zachary the seal episodes. Well, I think we should end. US Go, because Zack and I have to see spider man like three hours from now and I have a I have a lot of thinking to do before then. was actually thinking maybe instead of spider man we could just watch the phantom menace and then the attack of the clones in sequence wall and then amazing spider ran to right way. You guys have bought your tickets, right Muff oh, spider man, like a month ago. Wait, what if you you should exchange them for tickets to sing too. I've heard that's pretty good. Oh, okay, if we're gonna bring up saying so closely the end of the episode. I will quickly say that yesterday I texted not a front, not a front of the show, Liui Penya, and I said little way. The same to cast is way better than it has any business being. The same to cast includes Aran Eggerton, Banno, Scarlett Johanson, Eric Andre Seth, McFarland, Nick Offerman. What the Hell, usher? Sorry, Matthew mcconaughey. They're just like famous people in sing to like like SAMs people. We like like it's an Allstar cast in syncto. So so our next after Prequel Inter our next episode, you can watch out for our sing to interview parts. You want to allude, like, give a hint at like without saying not yet, not yet, not yet. Well, let's just say we did a huge interview today, as the day that we are recording this, we have done a massive, over one hour or maybe over ninety minutes long interview with and, let's just say, the New Year it's going to be a trent part versus the world. No, no, yeah, okay, all right, that's enough. Fuck team deaconds.

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